August 29

Luke had a great second semester at school earlier this year. The team at KCS, and especially his EA have created programs to help Luke in every way. He enjoyed cooking, swimming, taking the bus, learning to read, PE (his favourite), and has graduated to unsupervised (as in, no EA) time on the playground during recess and lunch hour. He is more independent, more well-behaved, more social, and more communicative than ever. Music to my ears is when the EA passes on messages from other teachers and administrative staff that Luke is "blowing their minds!" "amazing" "doing SO well". This, I like to hear. We had his end-of-year interview to discuss his IEP and how many goals were met; and there were many that exceeded expectations. Don't get me wrong, there are still some things he struggles with (reading, printing, functional play), but overall he's progressing; which is all that matters. We are planning a "status-quo" next year (don't fix what ain't broke) with 4 days with his current EA and one day with Social Butterflies (a Behavioural Consultant and team upstairs in the school building). He will continue to have speech ("Luke has mastered things she's been trying to teach him for years!"), as well as vision therapy with Dr. S. I am in search of a new physiotherapist, and hoping to have something in place by the fall (sad to say, our current one is moving to Calgary). He will continue with his Grade 2 cohort onto Grade 3 and this is where he will stay, and move along with them. He is connecting with the children (it's a nice smaller class size), and was even invited (first time ever without Joel!) to a birthday party for sweet twins in his class. So amazing. He wants to "take a turn" at pretty much anything other kids are doing, and for another first, he is comfortable on a swing (I finally pushed him on a swing! Great day, heart swelled). Which means he's feeling more physically confident and his core is strengthening. He is growing taller all the time, with beautiful long-ish blond hair, and is the healthiest eater (vegetables, fruit, protein)... we are acquiring a new upright freezer for garage as these boys CAN EAT! Ayiyiyi.

One of the highlights of the year was our trip to Mexico. We were a little nervous at how Luke would react to everything, but of course, in particular, the airplane and the concept of flying in the air. Our fears were unfounded as he was perfectly fine. Joel was a little more nervous than Luke! In the end, both were amazing travellers and we had the best time just relaxing on the beach or poolside. The meals were delicious and there was always something for Luke (gluten-free/dairy-free). we were not over-vigilant about his diet, which made the time even more relaxing. I feel as he grows up, small "dairy" slips are not a concern. Wheat we are still strict about, but like I said, there were no ingredients lists at the Mexican buffets or restaurants, so we chose not worry. The boys LOVED having their own special drinks created for them at the bar... "Minion Crush" was their favourite. They just played... on the beach, in the pool, sun-kissed and blessed. What an amazing time, something we waited for so long. It was so worth it. Joel, of course, wants to go back asap; lol.

Summer was the best. I call it my "Magic Summer" because the boys are getting older and soon I know they will not be so cuddly or mama's boys anymore as their friends begin to be more influential. We spent so many nights at our trailer this summer, that I forgot to count. The boys were in their glory, as all boys should be... catching frogs/salamanders/water striders, learning about social relationships with other kids at the resort (their mini "city"), eating marshmallows, fishing, biking, geo-caching, swimming further and further out, kayaking, and a million life lessons only learned when playing. Luke was in there like a dirty shirt this year... continuing to learn to bike with dad's help, and especially tagging along while all the kids played mantracker. He loved it. For the most part, he "blended" in, with the odd need for interference from us or the resort staff. He can still get a little carried away in his own world and I believe he sometimes needs a little time there, but then also needs someone to help bring him back to us :). These times are fewer and farther in between.

Luke turned 12 on July 26 and for the very first time, he seemed fully aware and engaged in his birthday. I asked him if he'd like to go to a movie and invite 4 friends. He said yes and proceeded to list the friends: Max, William, Keefer and Liam. I sent invites to these boy's moms and all 4 were able to make it! We went to see "Ice Age-Collision Course" and then had the boys over for tether ball, pie-face, and taco dinner with cupcakes for dessert. Luke loved it. Last year we didn't have a party, and the year before we had tons of kids over but Luke was too overwhelmed to fully participate and ended up inside (away from everyone) for most of the party. This year he opened his presents and LOVED them (thanks moms!)... he played with the boys and stayed with them all in the backyard. He was delighted; and we were so impressed with his interaction and connection. Yay. Oh, and the best gift ever was Dave's idea of an iShuffle with a speaker... Luke LOVES MUSIC, and now the boys play this every night; skipping some songs sometimes. They enjoy it in the car or before bed, even in the trailer. While on a road trip, we downloaded another 17 favourite/classics including Tragically Hip, Beastie Boys, Neil Young, Five for Fighting (Luke remembered all the words from when we played this often when he was little!), Queen... songs the boys needed to know. They loved it, and Joel even introduced us to a few of his faves (Fireball, Smooth Criminal).

Towards the end of July Joel went to Golf Camp while Luke went to our physiotherapist for some new therapy (we jokingly called it "Physiotherapy Camp", lol). I read this amazing book this summer on the Anat Baniel method which basically uses gentle physical movement to help a child connect their brain more to their body by walking them through early child development stages that they may not have properly mastered. For example, in Luke's case he never really "crawled"... he actually skootched/slid backwards everywhere. So Ms. C. taught him to crawl (at age 12, lol)! He had to learn to "trot" crawl (opposite hands and knees) and "pace" crawl (same hand/knee). It was fascinating to see that he couldn't do this at first, but within a few days, he did it automatically! According to Anat Baniel, this "taking them back through and teaching them typical developmental stages" can create amazing new connections in the brain. We did 4x45 minutes of this treatment and it was noted that Luke is very intelligent and it did not take long for him to learn. After I had read the book, I googled this method and Kamloops and found a local lady who specializes in this (also know as feldenkrais). She came to one of our physiotherapy sessions to not only meet Ms. C. but also familiarize herself with Luke and his abilities/capabilities. She was impressed and understood what C. was doing. I have hired her to work with Luke for an hour a day this last week before school to see what she can do to continue this type of therapy because Ms.C. is moving to Calgary in a few months. I am excited to see what changes/connections this new woman will create for Luke. The plan is for her to come to the school once a week for several weeks to continue working with Luke; but as of today Autism Funding is not covering the cost of this treatment. I have challenged their decision, and will hear back to see if I can convince them to change their mind (otherwise it will once again be another treatment out of our pocket, eep). We shall see. This is the frustrating part of advocating... not only finding the therapy locally, and actually finding someone who has time now (there's waitlists everywhere for therapists), and then finding a way to have the treatment covered. I realize we are blessed with Autism Funding, so it will be what it will be. To be honest, God always finds a way to cover costs when it comes to Luke, so I never worry.

Do I see changes as a result of this therapy? I honestly don't know. I will try to watch and see what this next week of sessions will result in. Sometimes, the changes are so subtle and who knows what's actually making the biggest difference (homeopathy / neurotherapy / physiotherapy)? For example, Luke has started asking "What does that mean?" when I say certain words (consequences, tip/bill at a restaurant, belching). His finger-picking has lessened quite a bit. His imaginative play is astounding! He helps unload the dishwasher with Joel. When asked to do 3 things, he does them (remembers all 3 and DOES them). His tics/tourettes have stopped completely. He goes to the bathroom standing up (never did this before). He volunteers suggestions for the meal planning. When I ask him to get the sardines in the grocery store, he goes by himself and finds them. So many "little" things, that mean so much. I can't tell you what's specifically working, but something is or all of it is. I'm not a scientist, all that matters is he's progressing!

We spent another week in August at Dr. Swingle's clinic in downtown Vancouver (he also had 8 sessions during Spring Break in March). This time was the best ever. The boys are growing up so much (in height and maturity). They were champion-walkers... we used to only venture so far, but this time they were the best adventurers! And shoppers, yay! We made a deal that if we went into one store I liked, we'd have to go into one store they liked. Well, what a blast. Between David's Tea, The Candy Store, Lush, Bubble World, Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory, and Cartem's Donuterie (gluten-free donuts!!!!), we did Vancouver! They even walked all the way down Denman, which was a good jaunt from our hotel on Robson... we had to stop for slurpees of course, but I was so impressed. So much fun! We went to see "Secret Life of Pets" and had dinner with friends in Granville Island. Oh, and Luke was keenly attentive for 7 of the 8 neurotherapy treatments/sessions. The one where he wasn't, we just had to "talk" about his behaviour and he straightened himself out lol. The best was getting a look at the visual improvements of his brain map from March to now. Something's working and changing for the best. I was able to have some of our travel covered again both times this year, so that helped financially.

I have to take a moment to mention the Abilitas Foundation. This is a group of people (led by a generous man) that have built a HUGE log home in the backcountry in Merritt. It is completely disability-friendly... low countertops for wheelchairs, huge bathtubs with lifts for the disabled, spacious rooms, all one level, along with gorgeous views and landscape. It is a serene and stunning environment. The best part, is it's free for anyone with a disability! I emailed them a few weeks before Spring Break when my other plans fell through, and within days of submitting my application they approved my request! Luke, Joel and I were able to enjoy this amazing opportunity to disconnect from the world together (the 3 of us had the place to ourselves for 4 nights... usually you have to share with another family). It was so peaceful there, and we hiked and played Spongebob Monopoly and took baths and had campfires and watched movies and played pool (Joel loved learning how to play!). It was the best and I'm so grateful for these places of respite for those of us who are caregivers/parents.

Joel and Luke will both be taking piano for another year, with the hope of eventually learning both guitar and drums. I asked a wise pastor-friend for his advice on raising boys and the whole "extra-curricular" activities... and his reply inspired me: He did the opposite of most parents, and said to his sons, if you want anything to learn to play/record/compose music I will buy it for you! And they are both musically gifted, one is even a music director in a church. Luke LOVES music, and Joel is a natural because of his mathematic rhythm and understanding of numbers/keys/symbols. I'm thrilled that they're still interested in learning and will continue to pay for their lessons as long as they're willing.

School starts next week, and Luke is quite excited. He loves his EA and he really misses her. I pray they will have another great year together! Let's hope for big leaps in writing and reading and academics. There will be a new-to-the-school Grade 3 teacher. I am hoping for a music program to begin with the incredible Ms. T. (have yet to see if that will happen!), as well as continued speech therapy and vision training. Plus continued life and social skills. It's going to be a great year. The boys are pretty excited that I will be working at the school one day per week bringing my graphic design skills to KCS to help promote the school.

Just a note about Joel: Joel has admitted to feeling lonely/having no one to play with; legitimate concerns. We've been trying to encourage him to engage Luke when he can, but also to learn to entertain himself. I am often available to play games: cards especially, but also Mastermind, Clue, Starwars Monopoly, and more. We are teaching him to be a good sport, taking turns, and that no one wants to play with a cheater. Joel has a keen, mathematical mind and loves numbers. I asked him if he had a good summer and his reply was "No." When I asked why? he said "Because I didn't do any math this summer." Ugh... whose kid is he anyways, lol!!!? He picked up the game of chess this summer too, which was awesome and while he's a little green on strategy, he still legiitmately wins quite often. It's so fun. He's enjoyed having a few friends up at the trailer this summer, as we've been really trying to encourage more playdates for him. He has such great friends, and I'm happy to say he's well-liked and has been characterized by his teachers as being a really "kind" person. Luke, as well, is known for his smile and happy disposition. Great Kids, Happy Parents.