January 21
Lots going on..

Luke had a bit of a rough start to the year as he had a new assistant for two days, and then another new assistant, Ms. K., who I finally discovered will be with him full-time until April 1st... after which Ms. P will be back until June 30. The consistency for him seems to be an imperative. I was called at home one day that a "substitute" assistant was there and could not handle Luke so the teacher sent him to the School's Learning Assistant's Room where she dealt with him. I showed up as soon as I could and had a talk with the Learning Assistant who explained that Luke took one look at the "substitute" and started acting up immediately (ie not sitting still in circle time, getting up and running around)... that the teacher was so frustrated with teaching a new substitute how to handle Luke that she just sent him out the classroom. Sigh. We decided altogether that when his assistant is not there, Luke will stay home. I am saddened by the thought that Luke seems unmanageable and that he is so disruptive. It makes me consider other options? I am also a little depressed that this is just kindergarten and the next 12 years of school seem daunting and exhausting as we have to constantly figure out new strategies to make Luke behave appropriately.

We also took a tour of Kamloops Christian School just to see what they offer. Luke was acting up in the small office... it was clear the principal was a bit uncomfortable with Luke, but he was gracious and very nice. They do hire assistants and would be happy to have both Luke and Joel. We walked around and Luke seemed very, very interested (peeking into classrooms), tapping on the drums in the music room... he seemed to actually like it there. So this is an option, perhaps down the road.

Some other positives: Luke is starting to have conversations. The other night daddy asked Luke what he did in kindergarten (he had Luke's helicopter and would not give it back until Luke answered)... Luke finally answered "I played with toys".... daddy asked what toys, and Luke replied "Lego". This is very cool. AND one day I asked Luke (at dinnertime) to tell daddy what we had for lunch, and he thought for a minute and said "Sushi"... he remembered and could relay information from hours ago. Also a huge, HUGE deal. Woo hoo.

Luke and Joel always fight... Luke "bugs" Joel (a lot)... until Joel screams. BUT the last few nights we've found them fast asleep together in bed. It's so adorable. Joel's going through a "scared" phase, so he gets Luke to keep him company. I found them in bed together and Joel said, "It's okay mom, I invited him over." I left them together. I love it.

We have a Wii that we bought for Christmas and while Joel has it mastered already, Luke is reluctant. We've tried to show/teach him a few activities and he seems so keen, but it is still somewhat beyond his capabilities. He does often ask "I want to play Wii"... but he doesn't last long in any particular game. We perservere. His attention span is slowly increasing... holding the remote longer and longer, or he runs with me while we "jog around the island". He really wants to participate and we constantly encourage him.

Luke's diet is amazing, for all you GFCF doubters... he eats the raw ginger that comes with the sushi (loves it), sushi (loves the "black part" - kelp), eats red peppers like apples, doesn't mind raw onion or raw garlic, eats celery and any vegetable. The best part is that now he feeds himself all the time. Even with a spoon! We had soup the other day and he fed it to himself! I was shocked as I remember thinking, "he'll never be able to feed himself soup". Never say never when you're talking about Luke :).

I learned some awesome things talking to other parents in the last couple days. One important thing is the when Luke repeats himself it's because he has to say it again and again until he really gets it. We learned a while ago that when Luke gets into a repetitive spin, we have to look him directly in the face and say what he's saying back to him really slowly. Then he will stop, it will sink in, and he's done. I also learned from an expert on behaviours that Luke's antsiness in circle time is largely due to unfamiliarity. If they don't sing a song he knows, or if he doesn't sit in the same spot, or if it's a new teacher, he loses focus because otherwise it does not hold his intereset and everything new is no comfort to him, so he freaks out a little. I'm going to approach the teacher about a concept called "pre-teaching" which means she gives me the list of songs or books she's going to read the day before or night before and I read or sing them to him. I hope she'll be willing to try this, but we'll see. The other thing I learned was that we were punishing Luke for not sitting in circle time by giving him a timeout, when positive reinforcement is much more beneficial. This means that if Luke needs a toy (comfort) to hold onto during circle time, perhaps he should be allowed to. Or if he sits still for one minute he gets a sticker, or if he sits still through the whole circle time he gets to play at the rice table (one of his favourite things to do). I'm going to discuss this with the assistant and see what her thoughts are. I've also sent an email to Luke's behavioural consultants and hopefully they'll come to Kamloops soon (from Kelowna) and go to the classroom and provide some additional tips, tricks and strategies.

January 31

Luke has been behaving a bit better lately. The positive reinforcement seems to be working. The assistant has a kooshie ball she uses to keep Luke focused during circle time. He goes for physio first thing in the morning for 15 minutes and is back in time for calendar/circle time. Towards the end of the morning his ritual is the same every day as well. He waits until everyone else has their coats on before he gets his on (otherwise it's too overwhelming). We have the BCs coming on Thursday to watch Luke in kindergarten and meet with us afterwards for strategies.

We went to Dr. Wagstaff today. Luke has a yeast flare-up again (arggh), which is probably due to the dirsuptions / foods at Christmas time. So we're back on the double probiotics plus an antifungal liquid. The other interesting thing is his dog and latex allergy / sensitivity has flared up again so that's being treated again. AND his serotonin levels are awry, which is the reason for the OCD behaviour (basically his fervored obsession with doors). We also noted how Luke had a rough couple of months with illness / colds and regression. Dr. W. mentioned that his immune system was a little compromised and during this time it is typical of kids to act up. Luke is no exception. He is also going through a growth spurt (I am hungry! I am hungry! I need a snack! I am thirsty!)... which causes increased irritability, frustration and anger (in Luke, ok me too... lol). Anyways, he was desensitized to these sensitivities in his system and he should calm down in a couple weeks. If not, we will need to go back.

Joel was tested as well as he's never had an allergy food panel test before. He came up with sensitivies to milk and wheat (just like Dad and Luke). So it is a blessing that he has been off these for most of his 3 years. Other food items he's sensitive to are: barley, soy beans, maple syrup, mustard, oats, pineapple and rye. It was also noted that he has an extreme skin sensitivity to fumes (ie perfume, detergent, formaldehyde, and many other airborn chemicals). This explains his rash from the detergent. He gets his own desensitizing drops and is quite excited about this (his response was a hug and a "Thank You Mom!"). I didn't realize he was a bit jealous of the attention Luke received with his 4x a day vitamin supplements / drops. Anyways, Joel was amazing and so adorable. At one point he told Dr. Wagstaff that he wanted to become a doctor :). And he told the assistant that he loves strawberries and carrots is his favourite dinner. They were a bit bratty during the 2 hours we were there, as was Luke's dad (lol). We survived and drove the 2 hours back to Kamloops. Joel also needs Evening Primrose Oil and we can begin giving him Cod Liver Oil with DHA and EPA.

One reassurance from the doctor was that we were doing everything we can. We can allow Luke to just be Luke on the weekends (I was feeling guilty about not constantly engaging him). And the other reassurance was that all of Luke's "looking at me to get a reaction" crap is totally due to him being in a terrible-two stage. Typical behaviour. And him touching people's noses and chins is actually a good sign that he's trying to connect. It's our challenge now to teach him about personal space (which he will learn eventually). He is definitely more interactive, and his speech is improving at an amazing rate.